Dave and Jesse do card tricks for Jake. [x]

  • JESSE EISENBERG: People on the street say mean things to me.
  • INTERVIEWER: Like what?
  • JESSE EISENBERG: I get called Napoleon Dynamite because I have curly hair. I live in New York City and I ride a bicycle. I always bike down 9th Avenue and there’s this kid who goes to school there named Abraham. Every time I pass him, he calls me Napoleon Dynamite. He screams it out and his friends laugh. That was a fine movie but I wasn’t in it.
  • INTERVIEWER: What do you say back?
  • JESSE EISENBERG: I say, “Please Abraham, I’m not that man.”

[x]


Teen.com: Advice for sharing your feelings with your crush?
Jesse Eisenberg: My advice to […] teenagers wanting to express themselves would be to try to do it via text messages, and, if possible, emoticons. Because then you’ll never have to really face your actual feelings and you can always tell the person that you were joking and your finger slipped. 

Teen.com: Advice for sharing your feelings with your crush?

Jesse Eisenberg: My advice to […] teenagers wanting to express themselves would be to try to do it via text messages, and, if possible, emoticons. Because then you’ll never have to really face your actual feelings and you can always tell the person that you were joking and your finger slipped. 

my celebrity crushes suck because i don’t want to have sex with them or kiss them or touch butts or anything i just want to be their best friend and work with them and have conversations and have in-jokes and somehow it’s worse